Friday, July 19, 2013

Pop goes my culture: Tara Reid up close

When my cyberpal Cairn Rodrigues asked me to write about pop culture, it seemed like a good time to revive my street cred, which pretty much died when Bill Haley and the Comets burst onto the scene in ’52. So I foolishly agreed.  Then today she’s like “Write about Tara Reid’s nip slip.” And I’m like “Huh?” And then I go “Maybe it’s like whosie’s wardrobe malfunction at the football thing.” So I check her out on the Google and confirm my suspicions. After seeing her picture, I’m like Whoa. (Cairn had written “It’s a chestnut,” probably not referring to the exposed protuberance.) Below is a photo of Ms. Reid, edited for relevance:

Over 18?
Click boob.

Under 18? You've
seen too much already.
Of course I am too old to admit to a degree of titillation (My 70th birthday is in October—no presents over $10 $20, please) at her pulchritude. Tara’s, not Cairn’s. Not that I—I don’t mean to say—you know.

So. Tara Reid. I understand she stars in a summer blockbuster called Sharknado, in which a tornado lifts thousands of sharks out of the ocean, while in defiance of the laws of physics it apparently leaves smaller fish behind. The sharks attack Hollywood like it was Pearl Harbor, except I’d think the sharks were the good guys. Anyway, some dude sees he’s about to end up in a shark’s toothy maw, so he revs up his chain saw and stands his ground.

The dialogue is quite compelling:

Guy #1: I hate sharks.
Guy #2: I hate sharks too.

Does cinema get any better than that? Well, perhaps in The Big Lebowski, in which Tara also has a part. But does she expose herself there? I saw the movie but forget her. I just remember guys bowling. How sad for me.

Cairn Rodrigues, who put me up to this nonsense, is a nice person with a rich sense of humor. Since what I wrote really isn't her fault, please visit her blog at